My Shaking Sunday

Let's see...
The TDT situation is ok, well, according to me it is.
I don't know what Apple is planning and I don't
want to be a part of it.

Yesterday, I went to do laundry so I missed choir practice.
I really wanted to go, but then,
Naw Prat came to pick me up to dance
and we practiced the whole day,
but this morning I couldn't remember at all.

My mom also wanted me to play the piano in church.
I was nervous the whole day and my body was so
freakin' cold.

Something I learned about myself:
My body shakes with ice during nervousness.

I did well. I was so worried, but after you
accomplish something, everything's good.
Now to learn another song to be frightened for
next week.

Stupid TDT

YAH!

What right do they have to hurt my friends?!!!!
Those stupid TDT Guys.
Stupid SC!!!!!!!!!
I really hate SC right now.
He's probably the one telling his
friends to have started it in the first place.
I didn't want anymore drama,
but it just seem that the drama
keeps following us KCS girls
and it's all because of me.
I don't look at the consequences.
I do stupid but confident to have done
what I wanted to feel.
I still love him,
but it's because I broke his heart so many times
that he's probably doing this.
Damn.
I don't know what's going to happen now.
I really don't.
Those girls heard that TDT were planning revenge
and they're going to do the same thing.
God watch after them.
Those girls...

Dayliar's Song

There she stands,
beautiful, delicate, but stronger
than a spider's web.
The one on her right holds her
selfishly.
Sing the song of the day.
The one on her left holds her
secretly.
Sing the song of her heart.
The three pillars stand
not budging.
The three related by blood
hold still their spot
to keep the day in their night.
To sing the song of the flower
in the midst of men,
she sings silently in her sleep.

Dreaming

She dreams
Every night and you visit
Every single time.
She's not crazy,
that's just her way
of seeing you when she can't.
She's going to tell you
one day
of these dreams and how much
she misses you.
She's going to tell you
how you're the only one
to visit when she's lonely.
No other boy has ever come to her at night
as much as you do.
You'll probably flow
into ever dream she has
until she figures out
a way
to tell you the truth.

Call

She needs to call
You to let you know
the truth.

South Dakota was Bomb!

The ride was entertaining with the women constantly talking,
the ride was frightening with the flat winds pushing against
the car, the ride was better than I expected. I rode with Zin Zin,
Gaw Thwee, and four adults.

When we got there, it turned out that we recieved more
blessings than my other friends. we were the only guests
in the house that we stayed in. We had plenty of blankets
and pillows and food to eat. The owners were barely there
when it was just us and we had a key to the house so it
felt like we were the owners.

The volleyball game was good too, but it could have been
better. There was the Karen New Year first and it was hardly
entertaining. It was very small compared to the one in St. Paul.
Anyway, back to the volleyball game. Any time we play,
somehow, we're always last.

Sh**
I think I may have accidentally deleted the group pictures.
Damn.

It was fun, but it could have been more better if a certain
person was there to snap at. Sigh. Oh, well.

She's Hooked

Can you believe it.
While her friend was talking
about her crush,
all she could think about was you.
You've got her hooked high, man
and she hates it but
she likes it at the same time.
Damn boy,
Sometimes it's a waste of
her time just to think about you,
but what can she do.
You've got her heart
and it seems that you'll never let go.
Don't let go of her heart then.
Keep it with you wherever
you go and
she'll keep yours.

SD Here I Come!

I'm going to the Karen New Year in South Dakota tomorrow
and I can't wait!
I've never been to South Dakota, but I hear it's boring. Duh.
There's barely anyone down there and no activities either.
The biggest shopping place they have there is K-Mart.
Can you believe that?
Any way that's not why I'm excited. I'm excited because I will
be going with Zin Zin and Gaw Thwee and I'm hoping that
person who's got me hooked will go with them. Oh, I'm just
 secretly hoping. My friends have no idea how much I want to
see this person.
AAaagh! I can't wait!

Homeless

Consider me homeless for the week.
If it weren't for my stupid sister,
we wouldn't be homeless.
If it weren't for the devil,
as my parents say,
we wouldn't be homeless.
So now I'm enjoying
living at other's house
but I'm not enjoying the stupid bugs that bite me in the middle of the night and the nightmarish dreams that aren't exactly scary but disturbing enough to keep me awake.
So it's my turn to be homeless
but just until I'm not anymore.

It's Hard

It's hard to forget
about you
it really is.
No matter how hard she tries,
you end up in her head
more than she wanted you to be.

What a Sin

This Sunday...

I didn't really attend church.
I was present but not really.
At the main service, Mu Moo and I took Aye Aye's car and we went over to Hnin Nu's where we spent most of the church service gaping at the stuff she brought back from Thailand. It was awesome! We were like little children at the candy store!

Then at the Karen service, my main goal was to sit and sleep and not listen, but Zin Zin stuffed mama up my karen shirt and we lied to Gaw Thwee that we were going to go pee, instead we went to eat. Well, Zin Zin ate, I just accompanied her. It was a cool day of rebelling against God. What a sin.

Advantage of You

It upset her to see
her blood related sibling taking
advantage of you.
You shouldn't be like that with her.
If you're trying to get to her
through her sister then
let all things fall.

Resolution

So on New Year's Eve, I didn't make myself a resolution.
That's because I didn't think I would need one, or because
I couldn't think of one.

But now that it is the Karen New Year, here it is:
I will post more about my life on this blog; I will not try
to obsess with She and You; I will put up pictures that I
actually took about my life.

My life will be what I will try to focus on this year
because other stuff is a waste of my time.

Happy Karen New Year!

Letting Her Go

You shouldn't have let her go
so easily.
You should have fought
with her
to keep her.
Yet you let her go
and made her contemplate the life
she had with you.
She doesn't regret
being with you and they say
a couple is closer
when they get back together
after breaking up.
During their time off from
each other,
they figure out that they're the best
thing that they have for each other.
She guesses that she's like that and
if you'll have it,
she'll go back to you
when she's ready.

Apologizing

In her heart she apologized,
but she's afraid it might be
like that song
where you loved her
with a fire red,
but now it's turning blue.
Where she said sorry like the angel
heaven made you think she was.
She hope it isn't
because then the chance to let love in
would be wasted.


*italicized lyrics by One Republic

Much of an Impact

She guesses that sometimes
a person's first love can be
with someone
they don't want it to be with,
but
it happened anyways and he's made
so much of an impact in her life
that she still can't forget him.

Imperfect Acts

When she saw you
her mind told her heart to be
stoic,
her heart listened and pretended
to be calm so that her act
would be true.
But her knees quavered
and her breathing flew
like a bird flying from fear.

Witholding the Risk

She doesn't understand
if she was really in love
with you,
or if she was only forcing it.
She really can't see what love is,
but now she keeps seeing you
and maybe
she's just crazy,
maybe she just wants
to be reminded of the risk
she put to be with you.
But she can't risk it anymore.
That rumor regarding her
broke her.
She's scared and right now
it hurts not to be with you,
but she knows this:
She's lying to you
to keep her parents from discovering.
She lied to her parents when
she risked love with you
and
she hated that.
So please be patient
to her. Please.

Invite Yourself In

Why must you invite
yourself into her mind?
She tried to push you out
but the more she tries,
the harder you push back
and you don't even realized
that you are doing this.
She tried but she's constantly
missing you.
So continue to invite yourself in,
continue to tantalize her.

Her Infuriated Mind

She still doesn't know if
she's lying to herself or not.
She's been contemplating
about you for days now
since Saturday.
Maybe you shouldn't have
cut your hair.
Maybe you shouldn't have
changed your style.
Because now you caught
her eyes.
She made a promise to herself
not to go back to you,
but that promise might break
if you keep changing the way
you look.
You've got her hooked again and its'
freaking her out.
She doesn't understand if this is another phase
of her crush on you,
or if it's love.
She hasn't cried yet because of you
and her heart hasn't been broken
because of you,
Maybe it's still just a crush.
So STOP what you're doing to her,
if she ever tells you what you're doing to her.

The Lover I Am

I don't really write
about my life. I mean why should I
since it's already in my poems.
But if you should ever
want to learn more about me,
Read my personal description:I'm a lover without a lover with the most complicated love life.

Let's not Tremble Back

Is it wrong to think
about you
after she broke your heart?
She tried to stay away
She tried so hard to keep away
from you
so that her heart, her emotions
wouldn't
fall back in love with you.
But now it seems
all she does now is think about you
She knows she shouldn't
but how can she stop
when you made her laugh?
When she can still feel you gently tapping
her head
away for annoying you?
She broke your heart once
She doesn't want to break it again.
She doesn't want you tangled in her battlefield
where
She fights her own emotions.
She can't do what she wants
She can't figure herself out.
So please just stay away
for now
She'll try hard not to tremble back
to you
to keep you safe from her.
She'll try to keep from being jealous
when you talk
with other girls.
She shouldn't feel jealous in the first place
because it's not in her right anymore
to feel this way
after she hurts you.
So she'll try to stay away
to not tremble back.