Just Say Yes- Snow Patrol

I'm running out of ways to make you see
I want you to stay here beside me
I won't be ok and I won't pretend I am
So just tell me today and take my hand
Please take my hand
Please take my hand

Just say yes, just say there's nothing holding you back
It's not a test, nor a trick of the mind
Only love

It's so simple and you know it is
You know it is, yeah
We can't be to and fro like this
All our lives
You're the only way to me
The path is clear
What do I have to say to you
For Gods sake, dear

Just say yes, coz Im aching and I know you are too
For the touch of your warm skin
As I breathe you in

I can feel your heart beat through my shirt
This was all I wanted, all I want
Its all I want

You probably felt this way to me a long time ago. I don't know your mind or it's thoughts right now. I don't know your heart anymore. But this was what I had wanted too a long time ago.

Change is Hard-She and Him

I'm all out of luck
But what else 
Could I be?
I know he's yours
And he'll never belong
To me again

I did him wrong
So don't brag
Keep it to yourself
I did him wrong

I was never no
I was never no
I was never enough
But I can try
I can try
To toughen up
I listened
When they told me
If he burns you
Let him go
Change is hard
I should know
I should know
I should know

So I'll keep my head down
If you keep it quiet from now on
In the halls I'd rather hear silence
Than the bells of new love

So don't brag
Keep it to yourself
I did him wrong

The Day You Went Away-M2M

Well I wonder could it be
When I was dreaming ’bout you baby
You were dreaming of me
Call me crazy, call me blind
To still be suffering is stupid after all of this time

Did I lose my love to someone better
And does she love you like I do
I do, you know I really really do

Well hey
So much I need to say
Been lonely since the day
The day you went away
So sad but true
For me there’s only you
Been crying since the day
The day you went away

I remember date and time
September twenty second
Sunday twenty five after nine
In the doorway with your case
No longer shouting at each other
There were tears on our faces

And we were letting go of something special
Something we’ll never have again
I know, I guess I really really know

Why do we never know what we’ve got ’til it’s gone
How could I carry on
The day you went away
Cause I’ve been missing you so much I have to say
Been crying since the day
The day you went away

Someone Like You- Adele

I heard
That you're settled down
That you
Found a girl
And you're
Married now

I heard
That your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things
I didn't give to you

Old friend
Why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back
Or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
"Don't forget me", I beg
"I'll remember", you said
"Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead."
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead,
Yeah.

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday
It was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise
Of our glory days

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known
How bittersweet this would taste?

LBC #2-Sleepless Nights

I tell myself that I will sleep late and wake up early so that the next night I sleep, I'll just knock out. except that doesn't work. I go to sleep late and it takes me hours to fall asleep so the next day I am sleep deprived.

That sucks. And working makes it even worse. When I want to sleep and take a nap, I can't because I'm working. I have to be awake to help.

Captivation

Could I be attracted to any other
soul other than yours–
whose soul has captivated me when I wasn't looking,
whose soul has lured me in with the deep vibrations of your voice.
Could my soul ever be captured
by another soul other than yours–
whose presence still affects me to this very day,
whose presence has a difficulty leaving.

LBC #1-Abandonment

You can compare so many things to love. Right now I'm helping as cashier at the Karen Marketplace and the owners are having problems. Their partner, the crazy Thai Lady, have simply abandoned them and now they don't have their own license to own a business. The business license is under the the Thai Lady's name and she just left them because, according to her, she won't really benefit from the business.

I feel like I abandoned him, because after we ended, his sister left their family with her boyfriend and he was having trouble with that. What I did set off a series of horrible events to his life and I still kind of feel guilty for that.

That's why after learning how complicated a person's life can be after you leave them, I've decided that I won't purposely try to abandon anyone. I promise to try my best to be in their lives when they need me and try to be always there.

First Love - Adele

So little to say but so much time,
Despite my empty mouth the words are in my mind.
Please wear the face, the one where you smile,
Because you lighten up my heart when I start to cry.

Forgive me first love, but I'm tired.
I need to get away to feel again.
Try to understand why,
don't get so close to change my mind.
Please wipe that look out of your eyes,
it's bribing me to doubt myself;
Simply, it's tiring.

This love has dried up and stayed behind,
And if I stay I'll be a lie
Then choke on words I'd always hide.
Excuse me first love, but we're through.
I need to taste a kiss from someone new.

Forgive me first love, but I'm too tired.
I'm bored to say the least and I, I lack desire.
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me,
Forgive me first love,
Forgive me first love 


This is what I felt before I thought that I would miss him so much.

Gravity- Sara Bareilles

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do, I still feel you here 'till the moment I'm gone.

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.

Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/s/sara_bareilles/gravity.html ]
You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.

I live here on my knees as I
Try to make you see that you're
Everything I think I need here on the ground.
But you're neither friend nor foe though I
Can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down
You're keeping me down, yeah, yeah, yeah
You're onto me, onto me and all over

Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long

Fall in Love with Me!

If you fall in love with me, this is what you'll fall in love with.

Someone who:

1) talks before she think because she's truly honest and she won't find anything wrong with it

2) will make you go eat ice cream with her

3) will spend most of her free time watching shows she needs to catch up on

4) Or read a book

5) says "ku-choo!" whenever you surprise her

6) will always look up to you

7) will blab about random things

8) sing songs stuck in her head

9) pretend to be listening to other people when it's not necessarily important

10) doesn't really care about how her living environment appears

11) is afraid of piranhas in the sky and in the bed

12) looooooves roller coasters

13) is afraid of caterpillars

14) will not go with you into the bathroom to listen to you vomit

15) will make you walk in the snow during a blizzard

16) turns on the car radio

17) will complain about the way your hair looks if it looks weird

18) drinks hot cocoa and coffee and thai tea and all of those other drinks

19) cries when she gets too mad and has no idea what to say anymore

20) cries during sad parts in romantic comedies

21) will not cry during heartbreaking things

22) will most possibly make you a hat to match hers

23) will flick your forehead when you’re wrong

25) will take you to her church and make you sit with her during the loooooong service

27) complains about too strong smells

29) falls for sarcasm

30) laughs at herself

31) will most likely fall in love with you too.

You have Caught my Soul

I've caught hold
of something that makes me happy,
something that has awoken me
from the deep sleep I had been in and it was you.
It was your presence
that re-caught my soul blindly.
It was  your presence
that brought me back to you
and I certainly have missed you.
When I saw a shooting star,
I had wished for love-
with you.
I'm finally falling back in love
with you
and I have no idea how you feel.

Waiting

Here I am
Waiting. For him I sit patiently
to see if he will come.
So much...I cover what I'm feeling...
So much...I want to talk to him...
So much...I think about him...
So much...I keep waiting
and waiting
and waiting.

Confession #1

I had Promised

Yet, here I am again
daydreaming about him
when I promised I would not do so.
Yet, here I am again
breaking another promise
I had made to myself awhile ago.
And here I am again being caught
by his presence when I had thought
I would never let myself fall again.

Chapstick

There are certain chapsticks that I can not put on my sweet lips. Chapsticks with petrolatum in them are not compatible with me. They only make my lips drier and they make my lips obsessed to be moisturized.

That's why I use Burt's Bees. It's my favorite chapstick.

My parents bought chapstick for me and it was the regular kind. I was fuming inside and gave it back to them. They went to Kmart to buy me the chapstick and they didn't find the one I like. So personally, if I couldn't find the chapstick that I liked, then I wouldn't even waste money to buy a substitute.

Goofing in Cultural Saturday

The Sleeping Stinky Flower

Photos by the Stinky Flower

My Butt was Hilarious!

Yer a Loser

Guess wat this is.........my calves

Stinky Flower

Kindergarten Crush

See that boy behind me? psst...i'm the girl with the sleepy eyes

He was my first ever crush. Most of what I remember in Kindergarten was of him. 

I don't remember the letters that we learned or the talent shows that we had, I remembered him.

And I finally found him on Facebook! I'm getting to know him again and I can't believe that I'm succeeding one of my goals in life.

Tacoumba

AAAAgh!
We got Tacoumba to come work
with us in the Peace Jam Conference!
He is so amaaaazing and I was
mesmerized
by his stories, I can't wait for the Peace Jam Conference!

When I Fall

I was wondering
and thought that maybe if anyone
asked me if I had ever been in love,
I would say no.
I have never been in love and that's the truth.
I may have liked boys, and
I may have loved them, but
I have never ever fallen in love with them.
Sure there's been moments of desire,
but that's lust.
Love and Lust
there's a huge difference between the two words.
I won't try to explain because
you can see there's a difference.

All I can say is that I have never been in love.
I will not try to fall in love any time soon.
When I do fall in love, however, I want to feel
that spark of electricity between me and the person
I will soon fall in love with.
Because then I will see the sign that we were meant to be.

Sure there's been boys who have fallen in love with me
already and they've already confessed,
but if I don't feel it, if I try to force it, then where's the magic in that?

I want to feel magic and exhilaration of being with
someone who will expose me to new things. I don't want to
be held back by those boys who have already fallen for me.
They will only stop my growth.

So when I do fall in love, I want it to be with
someone new,
someone who takes my breath away,
someone who knows how to say that I am beautiful,
someone who says that he likes me and is interested in me first before he says he loves me,
someone who can make me trust him,
someone who can entertain me,
someone who can make me laugh.

When I do fall in love,
I'll feel his impact on me and just know.

Ice Skating...

...was SUPER FUN!

I hardly took a  break and I can't wait to get back on the ice.
It was a very active thing for me and made me think that
if I loved doing this thing so much, I should just start
exercising like this.

I took a lot of photos of my friends ice skating so here's the
view of the night!

A Super Train

A Train of Flurries

Sarangheo!

New Music Video

So the Eastern Star Choir is making a music video.

Singer- Full Stop
Main girl- Phyu Zar
Main boy- Rambo
Friends- Maekaba, Eh Kler Dah, Giri
Director- Prat
Back Seat Director- Maekaba
Camera Man- Thinni
Behind the Scenes Camera Women- Zin Zin, Giri
Driver- Hgaw Thwee

Story Line: Two friends secretly love each other 

That's about it. There's not really anything special,
except that this is the first time any of us are doing a thing like this.

Phyu Zar Putting on Makeup

A Most Successful Jump

The Duration of a Jump

So Far So Good

My Shaking Sunday

Let's see...
The TDT situation is ok, well, according to me it is.
I don't know what Apple is planning and I don't
want to be a part of it.

Yesterday, I went to do laundry so I missed choir practice.
I really wanted to go, but then,
Naw Prat came to pick me up to dance
and we practiced the whole day,
but this morning I couldn't remember at all.

My mom also wanted me to play the piano in church.
I was nervous the whole day and my body was so
freakin' cold.

Something I learned about myself:
My body shakes with ice during nervousness.

I did well. I was so worried, but after you
accomplish something, everything's good.
Now to learn another song to be frightened for
next week.

Stupid TDT

YAH!

What right do they have to hurt my friends?!!!!
Those stupid TDT Guys.
Stupid SC!!!!!!!!!
I really hate SC right now.
He's probably the one telling his
friends to have started it in the first place.
I didn't want anymore drama,
but it just seem that the drama
keeps following us KCS girls
and it's all because of me.
I don't look at the consequences.
I do stupid but confident to have done
what I wanted to feel.
I still love him,
but it's because I broke his heart so many times
that he's probably doing this.
Damn.
I don't know what's going to happen now.
I really don't.
Those girls heard that TDT were planning revenge
and they're going to do the same thing.
God watch after them.
Those girls...

Dayliar's Song

There she stands,
beautiful, delicate, but stronger
than a spider's web.
The one on her right holds her
selfishly.
Sing the song of the day.
The one on her left holds her
secretly.
Sing the song of her heart.
The three pillars stand
not budging.
The three related by blood
hold still their spot
to keep the day in their night.
To sing the song of the flower
in the midst of men,
she sings silently in her sleep.

Dreaming

She dreams
Every night and you visit
Every single time.
She's not crazy,
that's just her way
of seeing you when she can't.
She's going to tell you
one day
of these dreams and how much
she misses you.
She's going to tell you
how you're the only one
to visit when she's lonely.
No other boy has ever come to her at night
as much as you do.
You'll probably flow
into ever dream she has
until she figures out
a way
to tell you the truth.

Call

She needs to call
You to let you know
the truth.

South Dakota was Bomb!

The ride was entertaining with the women constantly talking,
the ride was frightening with the flat winds pushing against
the car, the ride was better than I expected. I rode with Zin Zin,
Gaw Thwee, and four adults.

When we got there, it turned out that we recieved more
blessings than my other friends. we were the only guests
in the house that we stayed in. We had plenty of blankets
and pillows and food to eat. The owners were barely there
when it was just us and we had a key to the house so it
felt like we were the owners.

The volleyball game was good too, but it could have been
better. There was the Karen New Year first and it was hardly
entertaining. It was very small compared to the one in St. Paul.
Anyway, back to the volleyball game. Any time we play,
somehow, we're always last.

Sh**
I think I may have accidentally deleted the group pictures.
Damn.

It was fun, but it could have been more better if a certain
person was there to snap at. Sigh. Oh, well.

She's Hooked

Can you believe it.
While her friend was talking
about her crush,
all she could think about was you.
You've got her hooked high, man
and she hates it but
she likes it at the same time.
Damn boy,
Sometimes it's a waste of
her time just to think about you,
but what can she do.
You've got her heart
and it seems that you'll never let go.
Don't let go of her heart then.
Keep it with you wherever
you go and
she'll keep yours.

SD Here I Come!

I'm going to the Karen New Year in South Dakota tomorrow
and I can't wait!
I've never been to South Dakota, but I hear it's boring. Duh.
There's barely anyone down there and no activities either.
The biggest shopping place they have there is K-Mart.
Can you believe that?
Any way that's not why I'm excited. I'm excited because I will
be going with Zin Zin and Gaw Thwee and I'm hoping that
person who's got me hooked will go with them. Oh, I'm just
 secretly hoping. My friends have no idea how much I want to
see this person.
AAaagh! I can't wait!

Homeless

Consider me homeless for the week.
If it weren't for my stupid sister,
we wouldn't be homeless.
If it weren't for the devil,
as my parents say,
we wouldn't be homeless.
So now I'm enjoying
living at other's house
but I'm not enjoying the stupid bugs that bite me in the middle of the night and the nightmarish dreams that aren't exactly scary but disturbing enough to keep me awake.
So it's my turn to be homeless
but just until I'm not anymore.

It's Hard

It's hard to forget
about you
it really is.
No matter how hard she tries,
you end up in her head
more than she wanted you to be.

What a Sin

This Sunday...

I didn't really attend church.
I was present but not really.
At the main service, Mu Moo and I took Aye Aye's car and we went over to Hnin Nu's where we spent most of the church service gaping at the stuff she brought back from Thailand. It was awesome! We were like little children at the candy store!

Then at the Karen service, my main goal was to sit and sleep and not listen, but Zin Zin stuffed mama up my karen shirt and we lied to Gaw Thwee that we were going to go pee, instead we went to eat. Well, Zin Zin ate, I just accompanied her. It was a cool day of rebelling against God. What a sin.

Advantage of You

It upset her to see
her blood related sibling taking
advantage of you.
You shouldn't be like that with her.
If you're trying to get to her
through her sister then
let all things fall.

Resolution

So on New Year's Eve, I didn't make myself a resolution.
That's because I didn't think I would need one, or because
I couldn't think of one.

But now that it is the Karen New Year, here it is:
I will post more about my life on this blog; I will not try
to obsess with She and You; I will put up pictures that I
actually took about my life.

My life will be what I will try to focus on this year
because other stuff is a waste of my time.

Happy Karen New Year!

Letting Her Go

You shouldn't have let her go
so easily.
You should have fought
with her
to keep her.
Yet you let her go
and made her contemplate the life
she had with you.
She doesn't regret
being with you and they say
a couple is closer
when they get back together
after breaking up.
During their time off from
each other,
they figure out that they're the best
thing that they have for each other.
She guesses that she's like that and
if you'll have it,
she'll go back to you
when she's ready.

Apologizing

In her heart she apologized,
but she's afraid it might be
like that song
where you loved her
with a fire red,
but now it's turning blue.
Where she said sorry like the angel
heaven made you think she was.
She hope it isn't
because then the chance to let love in
would be wasted.


*italicized lyrics by One Republic

Much of an Impact

She guesses that sometimes
a person's first love can be
with someone
they don't want it to be with,
but
it happened anyways and he's made
so much of an impact in her life
that she still can't forget him.

Imperfect Acts

When she saw you
her mind told her heart to be
stoic,
her heart listened and pretended
to be calm so that her act
would be true.
But her knees quavered
and her breathing flew
like a bird flying from fear.

Witholding the Risk

She doesn't understand
if she was really in love
with you,
or if she was only forcing it.
She really can't see what love is,
but now she keeps seeing you
and maybe
she's just crazy,
maybe she just wants
to be reminded of the risk
she put to be with you.
But she can't risk it anymore.
That rumor regarding her
broke her.
She's scared and right now
it hurts not to be with you,
but she knows this:
She's lying to you
to keep her parents from discovering.
She lied to her parents when
she risked love with you
and
she hated that.
So please be patient
to her. Please.

Invite Yourself In

Why must you invite
yourself into her mind?
She tried to push you out
but the more she tries,
the harder you push back
and you don't even realized
that you are doing this.
She tried but she's constantly
missing you.
So continue to invite yourself in,
continue to tantalize her.

Her Infuriated Mind

She still doesn't know if
she's lying to herself or not.
She's been contemplating
about you for days now
since Saturday.
Maybe you shouldn't have
cut your hair.
Maybe you shouldn't have
changed your style.
Because now you caught
her eyes.
She made a promise to herself
not to go back to you,
but that promise might break
if you keep changing the way
you look.
You've got her hooked again and its'
freaking her out.
She doesn't understand if this is another phase
of her crush on you,
or if it's love.
She hasn't cried yet because of you
and her heart hasn't been broken
because of you,
Maybe it's still just a crush.
So STOP what you're doing to her,
if she ever tells you what you're doing to her.

The Lover I Am

I don't really write
about my life. I mean why should I
since it's already in my poems.
But if you should ever
want to learn more about me,
Read my personal description:I'm a lover without a lover with the most complicated love life.

Let's not Tremble Back

Is it wrong to think
about you
after she broke your heart?
She tried to stay away
She tried so hard to keep away
from you
so that her heart, her emotions
wouldn't
fall back in love with you.
But now it seems
all she does now is think about you
She knows she shouldn't
but how can she stop
when you made her laugh?
When she can still feel you gently tapping
her head
away for annoying you?
She broke your heart once
She doesn't want to break it again.
She doesn't want you tangled in her battlefield
where
She fights her own emotions.
She can't do what she wants
She can't figure herself out.
So please just stay away
for now
She'll try hard not to tremble back
to you
to keep you safe from her.
She'll try to keep from being jealous
when you talk
with other girls.
She shouldn't feel jealous in the first place
because it's not in her right anymore
to feel this way
after she hurts you.
So she'll try to stay away
to not tremble back.